opinion

Advent Calendar 17 – Putting a spin on things

Advent Calendar 17 – Putting a spin on things

December 17, 2018
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Selling.

In Sweden, the land of the Jante-law, there isn’t anything quite as bad as selling. The image of a slick used car-dealer comes to mind, a lowlife, busy talking, never listening, wanting to trick me into buying a cheap car for more than it’s worth…

As I am self-employed since October of 2007, selling is a vital part of my professional life. If I didn’t “sell myself and my competence”, I would not be able to continue to be self-employed. It just wouldn’t work. But the inner resistance to selling has been massive, let me tell you.

So when I heard from someone that selling isn’t about tricking people into buying stuff they don’t really need, it’s about inviting people to look at something that I have found provides value to me something shifted within! All of a sudden, instead of selling being hard, uncomfortable, and something I wasn’t really proud of doing, there was a free-flowing energy, champagne bubbles and a playfulness in its place. From this viewpoint – selling is like asking someone to dance. I get a Yes or a No, and either way, I know what my next step will be; Either I start to dance, or I move on to the next person, inviting them to dance with me.

Both these viewpoints on selling are simply stories I’m telling myself. Neither is Truth. Both are opinions. The GPS-facts of a sale concern a transaction between two (or more) parties. The negative and the positive spin I put on that fact, is my opinion on it. So, why choose to put a spin on selling which doesn’t serve me (making me feel like a slick car salesman, pushing you into a sale), instead of a spin which does serve me (Wanna dance? Yes? Whoop! Great, let’s dance! No? Whoop, great, thanks for telling me! I’ll ask the next one in line to dance.)?

And selling is, of course, but one of all the words, actions and activities I am involved with, where I place opinions on a fact that might or might not serve me. The more aware I get about this, the better choices I can make!


Advent Calendar 2018 – number 17 of 24 – on the theme of being gentle.

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Meditations (book 13 of 26)

July 1, 2018
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in Tip
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MeditationsMeditations. Written by Marcus Aurelius. Not intended to be published as a book (containing a total of 12 books or sections, presumably written at different times in his latter life.), at all. Rather this is something he wrote to himself, of for himself, seemingly daily musings.

Treat with respect the power you have to form an opinion. By it alone can the helmsman within you avoid forming opinions that are at variance with nature and with the constitution of a reasonable being. From it you may look to attain circumspection, good relations with your fellow-men, and conformity with the will of heaven. Book 3, #9

Put from you the belief that “I have been wronged”, and with it will go the feeling. Reject your sense of injury, and the injury itself disappears. Book 4, #7

Once dismiss the view you take, and you are out of danger. Who, then, is hindering such dismissal? Book 12, #25

Several things strike me as I read it, the first is how non-foreign it seems. I mean, this is a book of daily musings written about two thousand years ago, and yet, it doesn’t feel that foreign to me, even though on the surface me and Marcus certainly doesn’t have a lot in common. And yet, many of these musings are ones I’ve entertained myself.

Think it no shame to be helped. Your business is to do your appointed duty, like a soldier in the breach. How, then, if you are lame, and unable to scale the battlements yourself, but could do it if you had the aid of a comrade? Book 7, #7

The second thing is the emphasis on self – not in a self-centered and egotistical manner, but rather: don’t point a finger at anyone else, whatever they might have done or not done, is really not for you to judge. At least, that’s how I interpret it.

When men are inhuman, take care not to feel towards them as they do towards other humans. Book 7, #65

Thirdly, the focus on love and unity, how we are all one, part of a greater whole (even though, looking at when he wrote this, and what he was doing at the time, being emperor of the Roman Empire, this certainly must have been fairly “filtered” in his understanding, to those of similar standing and heritage/nationality).

Would you wish for the praise of one who thrice and hour calls down curses on his own head? Would you please one who cannot even please himself? And how can a man be pleased with himself, when he repents of well-nigh everything he does? Book 8, #54

I like it though, this book. And in my view, it proved one of the most interesting GIFTED book club conversations we’ve had, at that. The book was my choice, and I wisely chose it for this specific week, knowing I could blog about it with the book fresh in my mind.

Today I have gotten myself out of all my perplexities; or rather, I have got the perplexities out of myself – for they were not without, but within; they lay in my own outlook. Book 9, #13

The quotes I’ve chosen here ring true for me. There are a lot of them that I have a hard time understanding though, or downright disagree with. I might blog about them as well, but for now, you’ve have to suffice with these few that I found great pleasure in.

Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one. Book 10, #16


The book I am blogging about is part of the book-reading challenge I’ve set for myself during 2018, to read and blog about 26 Swedish and 26 English books, one book every week, books that I already own.

 

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